All-out. It has been declared.
I tried to be nice, spiders. I tried to be understanding and compassionate. Plus there was that whole "Charlotte's Web was my favorite book when I was a kid and all these spiders must be just like that spider who is both a good writer and a good friend" thing. No more. No more, I say. You have overrun my apartment. You are even in my car — I saw you, spider crawling up my arm!! There is not a square inch that your spiny legs have not touched. If I see another fuzzy egg sac, I may just lose it.
So be forewarned, spiders. Here is your chance to get the heckles out of my apartment. Because last year, when I let you quietly go about your lives spinning your webs, is over. This year, it will be a spider slaughter. Run for your lives, because I will show you no mercy.
4 comments:
Good to see you've finally joined the rest of humankind in our struggle against all that is spider.
The casualty count so far: 4 spiders, 3 gnats.
Um, I believe that living with me for a summer has rubbed off on you. Although I guess you are still brave enough to kill them - with or without the use of a swiffer? Why are there so many? I would be going nuts!
My apartment was empty for the summer so they took advantage of my long absence. It's on. I'll use my bare hand if I have to.
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